They're here... to save the world

When three parapsychology professors of Columbia University (Peter Venkman, Ray Stantz and Egon Spengler) are fired, they decide to go into business by themselves setting up their own ghost extermination company in an old firehouse. They become the Ghostbusters, trapping ghosts, spirits and poltergeists for money. Their first customer is an orchestra cello player, Dana Barrett: it seems strange things are happening in her apartment, on the 22nd floor of a high rise apartment building on Central Park West... and very soon, weird things will begin to happen as well in the apartment of one of Dana's neighbours, Louis Tully. Meanwhile, the Ghostbusters, after some initial skepticism, become really popular in NY, and are joined by Winston Zeddmore - who's looking for a well paid job.

But suddenly things get more complicated... because the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) agent Walter Peck thinks the Ghostbusters are frauds, and has the Ghostbusters put in jail... until New York City is put under siege by an ancient Sumerian God, Gozer the Gozerian, who is channeled through the apartment building where Dana and Louis live in. Then Peck must accept that everything the Ghostbusters are saying is true, and the mayor has no choice but to let the Ghostbusters out of jail to face Gozer... but will they be able of saving the world of this terrifying menace?

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Movie information

Ghostbusters (1984)
Directed by: Ivan Reitman
Writing credits: Dan Aykroyd & Harold Ramis (and Rick Moranis - uncredited)
Genre: Sci-Fi / Fantasy / Comedy
Runtime: 107 min
Country: USA
Language: English
Color: Color (Metrocolor)

Main Cast:
Bill Murray .... Dr. Peter Venkman
Dan Aykroyd .... Dr. Raymond Stantz
Sigourney Weaver .... Dana Barrett
Harold Ramis .... Dr. Egon Spengler
Rick Moranis .... Louis Tully
Annie Potts .... Janine Melnitz
William Atherton .... Walter Peck
Ernie Hudson .... Winston Zeddemore
David Margulies .... Mayor
Slavitza Jovan .... Gozer

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Movie Quotes

Dr. Peter Venkman: Oh my God. Look at all the junk food.
Dana Barrett: No. No, Dammit. Look this wasn't here...
Dr. Peter Venkman: You actually eat this?
Dana Barrett: No, this wasn't here. There was nothing here. There was this... space, with a building or something with flames coming out of it, and there were creatures writhing around it, and they were growling and snarling. And there were flames, and I heard a voice say "Zuul" I mean it was right here.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Well I'm sorry, I'm just not getting any reading.
Dana Barrett: Well are you sure you're using that thing correctly?
Dr. Peter Venkman: Yeah, Its not... I mean I think so, but Im sure there are no animals in there.
Dana Barrett: This is great. Either I have a monster in my kitchen or I'm completely crazy.
Dr. Peter Venkman: [smiles] I don't think you're crazy.
Dana Barrett: [sarcastically] Oh good, that makes me feel so much better.

Gozer: Are you a god?
Dr. Raymond Stantz: No.
Gozer: Then die.
Winston Zeddemore: Ray. When someone asks you if you're a god, you say yes.

Winston Zeddemore: Hey, wait a minute. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hold it. Now, are we actually gonna go before a federal judge, and tell him that some moldy Babylonian God is going to drop in on Central Park West, and start tearing up the city?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Sumerian, not Babylonian.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Yeah. Big difference.
Winston Zeddemore: No offense, guys, but I've gotta get my own lawyer.

Dr. Peter Venkman: This city is headed for a disaster of biblical proportions.
Mayor: What do you mean, "biblical"?
Dr. Raymond Stantz: What he means is Old Testament, Mr. Mayor, real wrath-of-God type stuff.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Exactly.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies. Rivers and seas boiling.
Dr. Egon Spengler: Forty years of darkness. Earthquakes, volcanoes...
Winston Zeddemore: The dead rising from the grave.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together - mass hysteria.

Man at Elevator: What are you supposed to be, some kind of a cosmonaut?
Dr. Peter Venkman: No, we're exterminators. Someone saw a cockroach up on twelve.
Man at Elevator: That's gotta be some cockroach.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Bite your head off, man.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: [Entering elevator] Going up?
Man at Elevator: I'll take the next one.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: You know, it just occurred to me that we really haven't had a successful test of this equipment.
Dr. Egon Spengler: I blame myself.
Dr. Peter Venkman: So do I.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: Well, no sense in worrying about it now.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Why worry? Each one of us is carrying an unlicensed nuclear accelerator on his back.

Dana Barrett: You know, you don't act like a scientist.
Dr. Peter Venkman: They're usually pretty stiff.
Dana Barrett: You're more like a game show host.

[Dana, possessed by "The Gatekeeper," answers the door]
Dana Barrett: Are you the Keymaster?
Dr. Peter Venkman: Not that I know of.
[She slams the door in his face. Venkman knocks again]
Dana Barrett: Are you the Keymaster?
Dr. Peter Venkman: Yes. Actually I'm a friend of his, he asked me to meet him here.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: I think we'd better split up.
Dr. Egon Spengler: Good idea.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Yeah... we can do more damage that way.

[evaluating a site for their business]
Dr. Peter Venkman: What do you think, Egon?
Dr. Egon Spengler: I think this building should be condemned. There's serious metal fatigue in all the load-bearing members, the wiring is substandard, it's completely inadequate for our power needs, and the neighborhood is like a demilitarized zone.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: Hey. Does this pole still work?
[slides down a fireman's pole]
Dr. Raymond Stantz: Wow. This place is great. When can we move in? You gotta try this pole. I'm gonna get my stuff. Hey. We should stay here. Tonight. Sleep here. You know, to try it out.
[Venkman looks at Spengler. Spengler slowly shakes his head. Venkman turns to the real estate agent]
Dr. Peter Venkman: I think we'll take it.

[business is terrible at Ghostbusters]
Janine Melnitz: [answers the phone] Hello, Ghostbusters... Yes, of course they're serious... You do?... You have?... No kidding. Just gimme the address... Oh sure, they will be totally discreet. Thank you
[hangs up]
Janine Melnitz: WE GOT ONE.

Dr. Peter Venkman: We've been going about this all wrong, this Mr. Stay Puft's okay, he's a sailor, he's in New York, we get this guy laid we won't have any trouble.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Ray has gone bye-bye, Egon... what've you got left?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Sorry, Venkman, I'm terrified beyond the capacity for rational thought.

[After the Ghostbusters fail to "get" the library ghost and instead run away in terror]
Dr. Peter Venkman: Hee hee. "Get her." That was your whole plan. I like it; it was scientific.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Mother pus bucket.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: My parents left me that house. I was born there.
Dr. Peter Venkman: You're not gonna lose the house, everybody has three mortgages nowadays.

Dr. Egon Spengler: I feel like the floor of a taxi cab.

Dr. Egon Spengler: There's something very important I forgot to tell you.
Dr. Peter Venkman: What?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Don't cross the streams.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Why?
Dr. Egon Spengler: It would be bad.
Dr. Peter Venkman: I'm fuzzy on the whole good/bad thing. What do you mean "bad"?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: Total protonic reversal.
Dr. Peter Venkman: That's bad. Okay. Alright, important safety tip, thanks Egon.

Dr. Peter Venkman: We came, we saw, we kicked its ass.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Somebody blows their nose and you want to keep it?

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Symmetrical book stacking. Just like the Philadelphia mass turbulence of 1947.
Dr. Peter Venkman: You're right, no human being would stack books like this.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Listen. You smell something?

Dr. Peter Venkman: I don't have to take this abuse from you, I've got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

Dr. Peter Venkman: 24 hours a day, seven days a week. No job is too big, no fee is too big.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Back off man. I'm a scientist.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Alice, I'm going to ask you a couple of standard questions, okay? Have you or any of your family been diagnosed schizophrenic? Mentally incompetant?
Librarian Alice: My uncle thought he was Saint Jerome.
Dr. Peter Venkman: I'd call that a big yes. Uh, are you habitually using drugs? Stimulants? Alcohol?
Librarian Alice: No.
Dr. Peter Venkman: No, no. Just asking. Are you, Alice, menstruating right now?
Man at Library: What's has that got to do with it?
Dr. Peter Venkman: Back off, man. I'm a scientist.

Dr. Peter Venkman: This chick is *toast*.

Janine Melnitz: You're very handy, I can tell. I bet you like to read a lot, too.
Dr. Egon Spengler: Print is dead.
Janine Melnitz: Oh, that's very fascinating to me. I read a lot myself. Some people think I'm too intellectual but I think it's a fabulous way to spend your spare time. I also play raquetball. Do you have any hobbies?
Dr. Egon Spengler: I collect spores, molds, and fungus.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Egon, this reminds me of the time you tried to drill a hole through your head. Remember that?
Dr. Egon Spengler: That would have worked if you hadn't stopped me.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Well, this is great. If the ionization-rate is constant for all ectoplasmic entities, we can really bust some heads... in a spiritual sense of course.

Dean Yeager: This university will no longer continue any funding of any kind for your group's activities.
Dr. Peter Venkman: But the kids love us.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Where do these stairs go?
Dr. Peter Venkman: They go up.

[Dana has described seeing a terror dog in her refrigerator]
Dr. Peter Venkman: Generally you don't see that kind of behavior in a major appliance.

Dana Barrett: That's the bedroom, but nothing ever happened in there.
Dr. Peter Venkman: What a crime.

[Persuading the mayor to let them stop a supernatural upheaval]
Dr. Peter Venkman: If we're wrong, we go to jail - peacefully, quietly. We'll enjoy it. But if I'm right, and we can stop this thing, Lenny, you will have saved the lives of millions of registered voters.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Everything was fine with our system until the power grid was shut off by dickless here.
Walter Peck: They caused an explosion!
Mayor: Is this true?
Dr. Peter Venkman: Yes it's true.
[pause]
Dr. Peter Venkman: This man has no dick.
Walter Peck: Jeez!
[Charges at Venkman]
Mayor: Break it up! Hey, break this up! Break it up!
Walter Peck: Alright, alright, alright!
Dr. Peter Venkman: Well that's what I heard!

Janine Melnitz: Do you believe in UFOs, astral projections, mental telepathy, ESP, clairvoyance, spirit photography, telekinetic movement, full trance mediums, the Loch Ness monster and the theory of Atlantis?
Winston Zeddemore: Ah, if there's a steady paycheck in it, I'll believe anything you say.

[Dana is possessed by The Gatekeeper]
Dana Barrett: Do you want this body?
Dr. Peter Venkman: Is this a trick question?

Winston Zeddemore: Do you believe in God?
Dr. Raymond Stantz: Never met him.

Janine Melnitz: Do you want some coffee, Mr. Tulley?
Louis: [to Egon] Do I?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Yes, have some.
Louis: [to Janine] Yes, have some.

[Egon is running tests on Louis, who has been possessed by Gozer and is now the Keymaster]
Dr. Egon Spengler: Vinz, you said before you were waiting for a sign. What sign are you waiting for?
Louis Tully: Gozer the Traveler. He will come in one of the pre-chosen forms. During the rectification of the Vuldrini, the traveler came as a large and moving Torg! Then, during the third reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants, they chose a new form for him: that of a giant Slor! Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!

Dr. Peter Venkman: NOBODY steps on a church in my town.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Gozer the Gozerian... good evening. As a duly designated representative of the City, County and State of New York, I order you to cease any and all supernatural activity and return forthwith to your place of origin or to the nearest convenient parallel dimension.
Dr. Peter Venkman: [Sarcastically] That oughta do it. Thanks very much, Ray.

[In a TV commercial]
Dr. Raymond Stantz: Are you troubled by strange noises in the middle of the night?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Do you experience feelings of dread in your basement or attic?
Dr. Peter Venkman: Have you or your family ever seen a spook, spectre or ghost?
Dr. Raymond Stantz: If the answer is "yes," then don't wait another minute. Pick up the phone and call the professionals...
Dr. Raymond Stantz, Dr. Egon Spengler, Dr. Peter Venkman: Ghostbusters.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: Our courteous and efficient staff is on call 24 hours a day to serve all your supernatural elimination needs.
Dr. Raymond Stantz, Dr. Egon Spengler, Dr. Peter Venkman: We're ready to believe you.

Winston Zeddemore: I'm Winston Zeddmore, Your Honor. I've only been with the company for a couple of weeks, but these things are real. Since I joined these men, I've seen shit that'll turn you white.

Dr. Peter Venkman: All right, this chick is TOAST. Okay sticks?
Dr. Raymond Stantz, Dr. Egon Spengler, Winston Zeddemore: PULLED 'EM.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Heat 'em up.
Dr. Raymond Stantz, Dr. Egon Spengler, Winston Zeddemore: SMOKIN'.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Bang 'em hard.
Dr. Raymond Stantz, Dr. Egon Spengler, Winston Zeddemore: READY.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Let's show this prehistoric bitch how we do things downtown.

Dr. Egon Spengler: I'm worried, Ray. All my readings point to something big on the horizon.
Winston Zeddemore: What do you mean, big?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Well, let's say this Twinkie represents the normal amount of psychokinetic energy in the New York area. Based on this morning's reading, it would be a Twinkie thirty-five feet long, weighing approximately six hundred pounds.
Winston Zeddemore: That's a big Twinkie.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Personally, I liked the university. They gave us money and facilities, we didn't have to produce anything! You've never been out of college! You don't know what it's like out there! I've *worked* in the private sector. They expect *results*.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Janine, someone with your qualifications would have no trouble finding a top-flight job in either the food service or housekeeping industries.

Janine Melnitz: I've quit better jobs than this.
[answers phone]
Janine Melnitz: Ghostbusters, what do you want?

[Janine opens the front door and sees a policeman]
Janine Melnitz: Dropping off or picking up?

Dr. Peter Venkman: Ray, pretend for a moment that I don't know anything about metallurgy, engineering, or physics, and just tell me what the hell is going on.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: You never studied.

[after Venkman's close encounter with a ghost]
Dr. Peter Venkman: He slimed me.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: That's great. Actual physical contact. Can you move?
[over walkie-talkie]
Dr. Egon Spengler: Ray, Ray, come in please.
Dr. Peter Venkman: I feel so funky.

[A giant marshmallow man crashes through the streets of New York]
Dr. Peter Venkman: Well, there's something you don't see every day.

Janine Melnitz: I think it's great that you're looking after that man. You're a real humanitarian.
Dr. Egon Spengler: I don't think he's human.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Are you okay?
Louis Tully: Who are you guys?
Dr. Raymond Stantz: We're the Ghostbusters.
Louis Tully: Who does your taxes?
Dr. Raymond Stantz: You know, Mr. Tully, you are a most fortunate individual.
Louis Tully: I know!
Dr. Raymond Stantz: You have been a participant in the biggest interdimensional cross rip since the Tunguska blast of 1909!
Louis Tully: Felt great.
Dr. Egon Spengler: We'd like to get a sample of your brain tissue.
Louis Tully: Okay.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Maybe now you'll never slime a guy with a positron collider, huh?

[The Ghostbusters HQ blows up]
Louis: It is time. This is the sign.
Janine Melnitz: It's a sign alright - "Going out of business".

Dr. Peter Venkman: Egon, your mucus.

Dr. Peter Venkman: As a friend, I have to tell ya you've finally gone around the bend on this ghost business. You guys have been running your ass off, meetin' and greetin' every schizo in the five boroughs who says he has a paranormal experience. What have you seen?
Dr. Raymond Stantz: Of course you forget, Peter. I was present at an undersea, unexplained mass sponge migration.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Ray, the sponges migrated about a foot-and-a-half.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Your girlfriend lives in the corner penthouse... of Spook Central.
Dr. Peter Venkman: She's not my girlfriend. I find her interesting because she's a client and because she sleeps above her covers... *four feet* above her covers. She barks, she drools, she claws!

[After nearly being crushed by a falling bookcase]
Dr. Peter Venkman: This happen to you before?
[Ray shakes his head]
Dr. Peter Venkman: Huh. First time?
[Ray nods]

Dr. Peter Venkman: I want to talk to Dana.
Dana Barrett: [In Demon Voice] There is no "Dana" only Zuul.

Walter Peck: Hold it! I want this man arrested! Captain, these men are in criminal violation of the Environmental Protection Act! And this explosion is a direct result of it!
Dr. Egon Spengler: YOUR MOTHER!

Dr. Peter Venkman: I'm gonna take back some of the things I said about you Egon.
[pulls out candy bar]
Dr. Peter Venkman: You... You've earned it

Dr. Peter Venkman: To our first costumer.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: To our *first* and *only* costumer.
Dr. Peter Venkman: I'm gonna need to draw some petty cash. I should take her out to dinner. We don't wanna lose her.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: Uhhh... this magnificent feast here represents the *last* of the petty cash.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Slow down. Chew your food.

[Louis is being chased by a demon dog]
Louis: [frightened] I'm going bring this up with the Tenant's Association. You're not supposed to have pets in the building.

[Dana is possessed]
Dr. Peter Venkman: I make it a rule never to get involved with possessed people.
[Dana starts passionately making out with him]
Dr. Peter Venkman: Actually, it's more of a guideline than a rule...

Male Student: What are you trying to prove here anyway?
Dr. Peter Venkman: I'm studying the effects of negative reinforcement on E.S.P. ability
Male Student: The effect? I'll tell you what the effect is, it's pissing me off!

Dr. Raymond Stantz: I tried to think of the most harmless thing. Something I loved from my childhood. Something that could never ever possibly destroy us. Mr. Stay Puft!
Dr. Peter Venkman: Nice thinkin', Ray.

Dr. Peter Venkman: [picking up his radio and speaking slowly] Come in, Ray.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: [excited] Venkman? I saw it, I saw it, I saw it.
Dr. Peter Venkman: [slowly, calmly] It's right here, Ray. It's... looking at me.
Dr. Raymond Stantz: He's an ugly little spud, isn't he?
Dr. Peter Venkman: [quickly] I think he can hear you, Ray.

Dr. Peter Venkman: How's the cellblock holding up?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Not good.
Winston Zeddemore: Tell him about *the Twinkie*.
Dr. Peter Venkman: What about *the Twinkie*?

Dana Barrett: [as the gate keeper] I want you inside me.
Dr. Peter Venkman: It sounds like you've got at least two or three people in there already.

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Every ancient religion has its own myth about the end of the world.
Winston Zeddemore: Myth? Ray, has it ever occurred to you that maybe the reason we've been so busy lately is because the dead *have* been rising from the grave?
[long pause]
Dr. Raymond Stantz: [Turns on radio] How 'bout a little music?

[Dana is possessed]
Dr. Peter Venkman: So, what are we doing today, Zuul?
Dana Barrett: We must prepare for the coming of Gozer.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Gozer?
Dana Barrett: The Destructor.
[long pause]
Dr. Peter Venkman: Are we still going out?

Dr. Peter Venkman: I'll take Miss Barret back to her apartment and check her out.
[Dana Barret looks up confused]
Dr. Peter Venkman: I'll go check out Miss Barret's apartment. OK?

[The Ghostbusters are climbing the stairs to the top of Dana's apartment building]
Dr. Peter Venkman: Where are we?
Dr. Ray Stantz: I think we're in the teens somewhere.
Dr. Peter Venkman: When we get to twenty, tell me. I'm gonna throw up.

Dr. Peter Venkman: You're gonna endanger us. You're gonna endanger our client. The nice woman who paid us in advance, before she became a dog.

[last line]
Winston Zeddemore: I love this town!

Louis: Boy, the superintendent is going to be pissed.

[in front of the library ghost, their first ghost sighting]
Dr. Peter Venkman: So... what do we do?
[Egon and Ray stare at each other in silence. Peter grabs Ray's ear]
Dr. Peter Venkman: Would come over here please? That's it, c'mere Francine. What do we do?
[Egon pulls out a calculator and starts punching in numbers. Peter slaps the machine out of Egon's hand]
Dr. Peter Venkman: STOP THAT!

Dr. Peter Venkman: I've always wanted to try this.
[yanks a tablecloth off of a table]
Dr. Peter Venkman: [triumphantly] The flowers are still standing.

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Links

Ghostbusters official site
Ghostbusters HQ

If you know about any other Ghostbusters related site, please let me know! :)

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